This review is a commission from an embarrassingly long time ago — so long, in fact, that there’s a possibility that I got the match wrong. The specifics are trapped somewhere in my Twitter DMs, so instead of asking the nice person who asked me to review a match back in 2024 which match (like, would they remember?) I took my vague memory of “Fit Finlay” and “pirate match” to YouTube and stumbled into this chain match that is also a flag match, which is, if nothing else, vaguely pirate-esque? Fret not, reader: I’ll be making it up to my patron somehow. Speaking of Patron, if you want me to review a match of your choosing, you can subscribe to my Patreon and do so once a month for $5, or purchase a one-off review for $10 on Ko-Fi. Let’s rock.
I’ve never seen Reslo before. It’s a Welsh wrestling show that feels alien to me, in part because the commentary is in Welsh, and in part because the arena set-up is so strange, with the crowd on the hard camera side sitting diagonal to the ring. The way it’s filmed is fascinating, a quasi-studio presentation with camera angles that remind me a lot of Lucha Underground, and between that and Finlay’s near-constant grunting and emoting, to say nothing of the kids shouting abuse at the Irishman throughout the bout, it feels like a children’s adventure show as much as it feels like a wrestling match. It’s a good vibe, though the gorehounds among us might be disappointed by the lack of blood.
I’m checking in somewhere near the middle of what’s probably a definitional rivalry for Fit Finlay, given how many times he wrestled with and against Danny Boy Collins, but like Reslo, it and Collins are entirely new to me. Finlay has a valet, a woman dressed in Native American garb, giant headdress included. Her name is Princess Paula and she is a) not indigenous, b) not from the United States, and c) was Finlay’s wife at the time, a well-respected female wrestler who, in becoming a valet, took on shades of Sensational Sherri and Woman, interfering on Finlay’s behalf and castigating him when he fucked up. The Native American gimmick isn’t good — is it a(n improperly garbed) play on the relationship that developed between the Choctaw Nation and the Irish in the wake of the Great Famine? is she just another in a long line of vaguely olive-skinned people who played the role for heat? — but she is, a moving target around the ring who serves to distract Collins and her charge, who presents Collins to her the way a cat presents its owner with a dead bird.
There’s plenty of opportunity for that, too, as Finlay is, in 1991, what you’d know him as in 1996 or 1998 or 2008 or 2012: a rough, brutish old bastard who never lets the fact that he’s incredibly good at the technical aspect of professional wrestling stop him from throwing a punch. I know nothing about Collins, as I’m anything but an expert on the English and European promotions where he largely plied is trade, so here I will note that he is clean-cut, good looking, and has the word “BOY” printed in big letters on his ass. In his red and yellow gear, he looks like Ken Shamrock if Ken Shamrock grew up under less-troubled circumstances. And was English. And was also a different person. He gets his ass kicked early, with Finlay laying in shots with the chain as soon as he’s able to, dragging him around the ring by his neck and his wrist until Finlay makes a mistake and goes to his flag too soon, ceding the low ground to Collins in one of a few instances where you absolutely do not want to give someone the low ground.
If you’re wondering how a match can simultaneously be a flag match and a chain match, this spot answers the question, and it rules. Finlay tries to get up the turnbuckles quickly to snatch the flag, holding onto the pole with his free hand, Collins gets back in and pulls as hard as he can, even executing a wrestler’s bridge to exert maximum force, Fit loses his grip and eats the canvas. It’s a simple, brutal reversal of fortune for Finlay, who quickly finds himself getting whipped in the stomach with the chain.
This segment of the match colors in more of Finlay’s game than what I was previously aware of, as I don’t recall him being much of a bump merchant in WCW or WWE. There’s a great tug-of-war spot where Collins, in the ring, baits Finlay, standing on the apron, into pulling as hard as he can, applying as much torque to his tug as Kenny Omega does when teasing a German suplex from the apron to the floor, only Collins just lets go, which sends Finlay crashing to the floor. Collins is the more valorous of the two, so he lets Finlay get back into the ring, where he goes for the eyes before resuming his gameplan of hitting Danny Boy in the face as often as he can with the chain. It works until he doesn’t, and when it doesn’t Finlay finds another shortcut: a low blow, a chain to the throat, anything to maintain control of the match.
It’s fun and well-worked, but nothing crazy. From the tenor of the crowd and the bright colors of the ring and Reslo logo, I’m guessing that this was a wrestling show for children, so there’s not much in the way of blood to juice the drama. Instead, the heel’s comeuppance is his own stupidity and sloppiness, catching himself by the dick and balls as he hastily makes his way towards the flag. I don’t need blood, not even in a chain match, but Collins doesn’t go for the flag until we’re 10 minutes in, and I think there was more drama to be wrenched out of that aspect of the stipulation. I know that asking for more “on a pole” spots in a match where Collins suplexes Finlay from the apron to the floor is a little much, but when a match gives you the opportunity for some unique hope spots, you take them!
Collins does at the very end, dropkicking Finlay into the pole while he’s reaching for a flag, which sends him to the floor. Paula spares Finlay the ignomy of defeat here, dragging Collins from the top rope to the floor by the chain, at which point Finlay rams him into the turnbuckle, goes into the ring, and claims the flag for himself. It’s a bit flat, so far as finishes go, likely due to this being worked for a television audience, leaving neither man with much time to breathe, let alone for Finlay to sell much for Collins. Worth the watch, if not the wait for this review.
Rating: *** & 1/2